2004-06-24 - 12:50 a.m.
i don't know why this bothers me, but it really does. like, it REALLY does.
remember how i said panya girl might be hot for me, but i wasn't sure, but i was going to think so just to boost my ego? well, today she came back and richard asked me to get her friends phone number, so i asked her about it blah blah blah... she left.
y'know, no big deal.
but then she came back to get something else and richard helped her again. and it just so happened that richard was supposed to go to lunch anyway, so he went with her.
and he got her phone number! it turns out that she likes him more than me! what the fuck?!
i graciously accpted defeat, but still, the question keeps running through my mind. why him over me?
not that i should care... but as a man, i still do. yeah yeah yeah. fuck that macho bullshit... but you know what? fuck you.
it's not that i don't like richard, it's just that, he's white and a lot older... and i'm more her age, and shit...
god dammit! this really should't bother me at all but it really really does! fuck!
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