2000-06-28 - 02:33:10
god dammit. stupid clorox dries too fast. from now on, im just going to apply the damn thing to his bag. yup. that was the plan, let him sit on clorox bleach. it woulda worked too, but the took too long to sit down, damn fuck. i swear, im gonna get him soon. yep, gonna get him.
anyways. i came to the conclusion that darsie complains a lot. not that i dont. but she complains about everything. watching movies in class. sitting in the sun. doing work in class. going to summer school. and her comment about how life doesnt revolve around summer school and so we shouldnt get work. i mean, c'mon, we dont get all that much work. we get like less than what we'd normally get in school. especially for a week's worth of school per day. its not that bad a deal if you ask me. im fairly content with the ammount we get, its not that much. sure... some of you are going to say, "but we have other things to do!" yeah? so? i can find the time to be shuckin' and jivin and grabbin' ass and read, and watch tv, and listen to music, and fuck around on the computer, and still finish my work before the next day (12 midnight). it aint that bad. and i wake up the next morning at 630 all set for the next day like it. i mean, i usually dont get home till like 230-330, and when i do get home, i dont start work till like 5 or 6. it aint that bad.
i find that girls in general complain a lot. not just darsie. but girls in general. guys are more willing to accept the facts then girls are. i mean, guys are more willing to say, "okay, fuck. we gotta do this, might as well quit shittin around and get started." girls on the other hand "what? why do we have to do that? i dont wanna do that... why do we have to do it mister? ah, c'mon mister... its summer school!" who cares if its summer school? your taking it to get ahead in school right? i mean, its gonna allow you to fuck around more your senior year, why not suck it up now and reap the benefits later? its well worth it.
okay, maybe that last paragraph wasnt giving birds full credit. and maybe i am a little biased towards males. but i'll tell you this right now, i give birds full props when it comes to taking pain. i mean it too! in fact i love girls more than almost anything in the god damned world. if anything that i love more than birds, its shooting my rifle competition style. i love to compete and win. especially since it happens so little too.
i have come to the realization that i win at too few things, and that when i do win, its always an insignificant thing. point-in-case: me and reece. when ever we do anything, he always wins. examples: i have never beaten him in risk. he always kicks my ass. 2) P.T. scores. his scores are consistantly higher than mine no matter how hard i train, no matter how hard i try. 3) any other card game. he always wins, no matter what the game. 4) drill team capabilites. sure he has one years worth more of experience, but still, hes wayyy better than me. 5) basic humor. hes a lot funnier than i am. what am i better than him at? riflery. just like im better than most of the school. but it doesnt matter, cause no one cares about riflery scores. see, so it doesnt matter that im better than anyone else at something, cause no matter what it is, no one cares about it. im just a loser. i should get good at something that people respect. hmm... what do people respect now days? i really should get in with it. i need to start working out so i can run like really fast and lift lots of weights. then people would respect me after i pound the shit out of gavin. heh, i can dream cant i?
i really need to get over his stupid ass. hes such a fuck, you know me and leo were talking about it, and we both came to the conclusion that hes funny. not "ha ha good joke" funny, but "ha ha your stupid" funny. we also have decided to start calling as many things as possible by their british slang.
bird- chick, as in girl
boot- trunk
lift- elevator
flat- appartment
lorrie- container truck
and so forth and so on as we remember them. i also want to start to speak w/ a british accent. i think brit's are cooler than americans. americans are lazy and stuipid people. we are also arrogant and offensive. we should all strive to be more japanese like in culture. japs i'd say have the best culture because it teaches humilty and humbleness. and it also keeps you from wearing your god damned shoes in doors, and on the bed, and everywhere else. stupid haoles.
i've got the song from the movie "Bridge on the River Kwai" stuck in my head. i was watching simpson's today, and they kept playing that, so now its stuck in my head. damnit.
i think i should die. just so i would know if there is an after life. me and leo were discussing it in school today and then me and kim had a brief discussion about it on IM. me and leo both came to the conclusion that there is no after life. your brain holds all your knowlege, all your thoughts, all your emotions, all your feelings right? but what is dead? when your brain ceases to function. so, how can you be an image of yourself? how can you function as your "soul" or "spirit" if you dont have what you once were? there fore you cannot have a soul or a spirit. i dunno, im just reluctant to believe in things of that nature. it doesnt provide tangible proof that it exists. thats why i still question weather love, hate, apathy, etc. are all real. is what i feel for gavin real? or is it just electric waves going from one brain cell to another? is what i fell for erin the same and yet different only because of how I as an individual percieve it? its funny, i can be so god damned intellectual sometimes, and yet im facinated by something as primitve as man kind. the boob.
yessire bob. im facinated with the boob, just as everyother man in this world is. i dont know why. it must be like genetic dominant from adam. ya know, i think almost everyone in the world is obbssed with the boob. women are always talking about its size and weight and so forth and so on. guys are talking about the almost the same thing, just in a different context. ya know? i never understood it myself. i mean, its not like its entirely different from what i have, it just has more fat under it and a connection to something that makes milk. i mean, why do we concentrate on it so much? i've caught myself staring at one that bounces, and i dont know why. and im constantly hearing girls talking about either size or lack of. like they want to be bigger. and then i hear the girls on the other side talking about how they want smaller ones. its all just so very confusing. i think i should make myself clear though. im not entirely obbsesed with it. i dont dream about having all the boobs i want. i dont look at them instead of the face of girls. i dont think of them constantly. they are not the first things in notice on a girl, nor the second. after that, i lose count. but i can tell you i notice the face and the hair first before i notice anything else. thats a fact.
i really should do my hw. but i really dont care much about anything any more. damn... this one is turning out to be really long. and its gone through how many topics. i think i'll end it here. a return to the old days too...
Quote of the week:
"when life hands you a shit sandwich, take a bite and hand it to the next motherfucker"
-ryan okuno
*as taken from Jevon's info
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