2000-06-29 - 04:03:29
Looks like my dreams of beating the shit outta gavin have been pushed back indefinately. Tonight, erin called me (yay!) and well, we were talking cause shes concerned about me and gavin having a scrap along with all his football buddies. Needless to say, im not afraid of them, im more afraid of Sheri, Whitney, and Jamie. Girls/Women who can kick my ass are very intimdating to me. but anyway, i promised her that i would not get into a fight with him unless it was the only option i had left, or if he hit me first. which i guess falls under only option. so, im just waiting for him to attack me. i really cant wait till the day comes that he does. sure i may be suspended or possibly arrested and detained, but i think it'll be well worth it to show him and his friends that i aint no little shit that can be pushed around like an insignificant little fuck. in fact, i've been doing my reading up on how to defend myself. you'd be amazed at the ammount of aikido used by the army in its combatitves hand book. FM 21-150. Field Manual 21-150. Its my new bible. In it i have learned where to hit to hinder, incompacitate, and kill and opponent. dont worry, i wont kill him. the most i will do is incompacitate him. i want him to be awake so he knows i kicked the crap outta him. i just want to break a few bones. i want him to be totally impotent (impotent as in useless). i want him to be awake when i stand over him and yell at him with saliva flying and blood white hot, telling him "YEAH MOTHER FUCKER! NOT SO BAD NOW ARE WE!?! GET THE FUCK UP! LET'S DANCE AGAIN BITCH!" i want him to feel the humilitation of being beatten up by a guy who's about 5 inches shorter and maybe 20-25 pounds lighter. I want him to know that i am not all i appear to be.
Hey, i can dream right?
i just know that that day is gradually comming closer and closer. and i know im not going to let him take it. he's gonna go down when it happens.
you know, this thing has turned into my "hate gavin page." i really should calm down. i mean, im taking this way too seriously. im reading how to incompacitate him. i think its a little to much right there. he probably wouldnt even attack me in the first place. hes a chicken shit without his other cock suckers there. i bet if the two of us met on a dark abandoned street corner he wouldnt do anything to me other than trash talk. so, im confident that i can beat the shit outta him. its mostly mind set. and i have the mind set to beat his face in. shit ryan. calm down already. chill. cool it. taking this way too seriously. just remember your promise to erin. no fighting unless its absolutly necesarry. at least i know what to do now. lets hope my recall ability is up to par...
okay, well i better stop here before i fuck myself up too much. bye.
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