2000-09-15 - 02:58:11
God damn... i've looked at how many diaries with an "angry" entry? and all have surfaced since i wrote my "angry fuck the world" entry. i really am begining to wonder if what i wrote sparked a fire in everyone who reads my diary...
lets see... who wrote an angry entry within the past two days? me. jenna. blair. and crystal. christ... is this all my fault? dear lord i hope not. just what i need, me influencing people... not a great idea.
well, what else? i learned that jenna does not like how ravers use glow sticks or mini-photon-lights. that made me cringe in inner pain. i think they're cool. when ever takatomo does it, i just stay put and watch. it fascinates me to no end. and her on the other hand... she thinks its stupid. grr...
hmm, what else... i found out that i walk 12 meters in something like 8.5 seconds or so. give or take .5 seconds. that was about the most interesting part of physics class. i hate physics class, its just not for me. first off, its a boring subject, i've been ruined for science since last year. and then theres the comfort factor. the room is warm, the lights are off, and its after lunch. im suffering from tiredness seeing as how its at the end of the day, and its lame and its got the right temp/lighting to fall asleep with ease. bad mix for ryan. it probably doesnt help that i eat skittles at lunch which will put me on a sugar low.
hmm, what else? Boss said that our peer ed mediation training that we did today was very realistic. it was me and shown acting as disputants and blair and kaycee as mediators. she said that we were very realistic. i dont know why. if you ask me, we dont train as we fight in that class. we train in perfect situations. the resolve is always the same, we dont deal with hard heads who dont want to agree. we always deal with people who are willing to buck up, y'know? it just isnt right. stupid stupid class...
oh, i also got a thing for the leadership camp. but the thing is, its on the same day as a rifle match, and riflery is always top priority for me. i find riflery as the best thing in my life. its the only thing i do good naturally. i dont know why i bother to do anything else. its all i do good. so im not sure if i can go to the camp. i hear its good fun and all, but y'know? frick... and kyle's already not going too so... maybe i can leave early... we'll see... gotta talk to Mrs. Mizo about it.
that reminds me, the frickin library is frickin booked tight as hell! i have to try get time for my tech crew to get in there and work on the web page, but the thing about it is that they have the place booked tighter than a virgin! i cant get much of any time in there during per. 2 when i got rotc, so i gotta let per. 3 handle it, and the per. 3 person isnt quite all there. so... i got it bad. damn... i just cant win i tell you.
im so tired of life. i mean, its gotten easier in the past few days, but i still hate it. crap. i still gotta do my alge 1 and psych hw. crud. maybe i'll do it tomorrow. we'll see. frick. lifes a bitch. stupid shit sandwhich. i dont like its taste, yet i gotta eat it so much. maybe its an aquired taste? hope so... im gonna be eating it a lot. along with a bunch of others. fuck.
oh yeah, riflery. people are using my locker as their storage place too now. people i dont even know! this one guy put his rifle in my locker and i dont know his name, he thinks is a team place. its my locker dude! frick... but me being the nice ass hole i am let him put it in there. and oki too. frick. i only want girls to put their shit in my locker cause i like girls better. but everyone wants to throw their crap in there... i so cannot win. fuck.
so tired. dead tired. maybe i'll go to sleep now. g'nite.
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